No ordinary dream, it's reality !

Well, today is Friday a few more days dah PUASA bebeh!! But kena ganti pulak dah, spoil. Haylahai. So back to topic, i had this dream about one of my guy friends. I think i had this dream on Tuesday, 26/25 July 2011. Btw, my dream it's becoming a reality, which is super awesome! Dah dua hari berturut-turut, just like and i mean exactly in my dream. It's awesome cause my dream is becoming a reality, but it's kinda awkward too be in that situation with one of my close guyfriends. Hmm, but still it's awesome! 

THIS IS THE BEST WEEK EVER !

I'm all fired up, and ready to blow!

Yoyoyo dudets and dudas! So, my last post was all emotional and moody. Well, now i wanna stop being all moody and stuff. I want to be happy and crazy. Like today, i usually hate Mondays.. But well, today i think i'm the happiest person in my class. The ratio of people that cried today in my class is 4:31, i'm not one of those 4 and one of the 4 is a DUDAS. You know dudas? That means guy lah. Haha. I gotta be honest here, it aint easy to stop hating, cursing, and stuff. So, i have to let go some of the things that made me mad, stressed and unhappy. Maybe YOU are one of those things that make me stressed? Yes you. So, if i ignore you or something. You know why. Sejak dua menjak ni, my life has been kinda teratur? Yea, i guess that's the word i'm looking for. I exercise everyday, try not to sleep late, focus in school, try not to be moody at school, always smile, avoid stuff that makes me "bad", try tak tinggal solat and now i've been dancing alone in my room everyday before i go to school. Haha, i'm pathetic! Well, no one in this house knows that i'm doing all this stuff. But these stuff makes me healthier and it makes me happy mentally. It better to keep these stuff a secret from my family, nanti diorang semua pandang pelik dekat aku. Haha, they think i'm the not hardworking one, the malas one, the lazy bum and more. It's kinda true though, haha. So, get ready earth. The new and kinda improved Shahira Mahirah is gonna spread her wings cause she was a caterpillar now she's a beautiful butterfly bebeh! Now my new hobby is DANCING ALONE! Hahaha, me crazeh. Prublem? :p

Solitary, i want SOLITARY !

Okay, so today i'm suppose to go to this Rumah Anak Yatim with my neighbors and such. Well, like usual i'm too lazy to go and do some work and help and walk and stuff. So, this morning a few minutes ago, i beg my mom that i don't wanna go. Thank god i didn't go today. But then my mom said i must go next week, wajib. Ternyata benda alah ni bukan sekali ja, berkali-kali pegi sana! Dammit, i feel like slapping everyone that i can see at that moment. So, now i cant do anything about it. Argh, i cant describe the hatred that i'm feeling everyday of my life! I keep getting depressed for some reason and sometimes no reason, what the hell is wrong with this world and me?! Sometimes i feel like sleeping beauty, i wanna sleep for a long time and then wake up. Now, i dont even call this house that i'm living in as my HOME, this is a house that i live in with my family and my noisy and annoying maid. I just want to go away from here, buy my own house away from this too friendly neighborhood. I want to live in that house all alone, with no one not even my sister. That's all i want right now, i dont even want to come back here every time school ends. Seriously, I HATE PEOPLE! I dont like being around them, i dont like talking to them, and i dont like seeing them. I know, i'm a "people" too. But why should i hate myself? Hmm, i dont know why i hate people so much. Some of them just annoys me, without they move or do anything! Oh, when can i achieve my dream of being alone all my life? All i want is ONE SOLITARY LIFE, it's not that hard to fulfill. Hmm, well my friends are people too. But i love them cause they sometimes understands me, but sometimes i just wanna get away from them. Yea, so if you're my friend, jangan terasa. I do hate people, but i still love all my friends, but some of my friends i like and some i hate. Haha. What? You think i'm overreacting? Well, you dont even know what i am. Nobody but Shahira Mahirah understands how my mind works, not my sister, not my twin, not my bestfriend, not my friends, not my parents, and especially not my maid. My mind is complex, you cant figure it out even if i gave you a manual for it. Since i was..well i dont know 6 i think. I've been a LONER, and since standard four or five it changed cause of my friends. Now, i'm Form 2, and the loner inside me, the real me, is coming back. Yea, i ain't my sis, the one that is talkative the one that adults like, the one that's not shy, the one that controls the situation, the one that's EVERYTHING. I'm the one that i dont care what you wanna do, the one that dont wanna think much, the one that hate talking, the one that ain't so friendly. That's why i hate being around people, especially adults. I rather talk to a wall or door, rather than talking to some human. So, i wanna say something to my parents if they read this post. Guys, i know i'm starting to be rude and stuff. But i cant help to stand and fight for what i want and what i think is right. Yes, this is stupid i know. But i hate how you treat my as if i can do what Shasha can, well i cant! I hate speaking, i hate being center of attention, i hate people, i hate competitions, i hate helping, and did i typed i hate people? Please, just leave me be and just see what i'll do to my own life. I dont want you to control me, yea i know you guys are my parents but i dont want that. I wanna learn my own lessons, i wanna learn it the hard way, i dont want you treating me like Shasha, i dont want that. I wanna see what my life will be without anyone but Shahira Mahirah controlling it. Please guys, leave me and watch the results. Can you do that, just this lifetime, pleasee! I cant say this face-to-face with them cause..you know. Kau sanggup cakap macamtu dekat parents korang? Well, maybe some of you can, but i cant. I hate being rude, i hate "melawan", "menjawab" and stuff. I rather keep quiet than speak and tell what's on my mind. But now i just cant stand it anymore, i just have to say what's on my mind even though doing that makes me look like i'm being rude with my parents and such. So, all i'm asking is for a solitary life. I just want to be alone! Not that hard ain't it?

Watch Collector

Suddenly i have an urge to collect watches, it'll be super awesome if i have a huge collection. I wanna collect any kind of brands, pasar malam punya pon jadila. As long as it's an object that shows time. I'm in love with SWATCH WATCH! I've been dreaming of buying one out of these three watches by Jeremy Scott. 

I really really really want one of these watches, especially the Yellow Lightning one! Oooh, and this one watch from SUCK UK. There's this watch called Paper Watch, it's plain white and you can draw on the watch. It's so awesome !

   

There's also these watches called NAVA TIME watches. They're (yes, you guessed it) awesome! There's black, white, orange, blue, and idk what more colors. Not only these nava time has watches, they also have clocks that are really cool! These down here are called ICON watch, i dunno anything about those. They have clocks too, and aren't they just cute?

Well, i dont have anymore watches to show you. So, these are my faves! Please, if you do care about me and my needs. BUY ME ONE OF THESE, or just buy any watch for my birthday. Thank you and i love you (only if you buy me a watch). Hohoh, just kidding. But seriously, buy me one. (;

WHY CAN'T I GET YOU OUT OF MY MIND?!